My concept of charity

My concept of charity derives from my code of ethics. I had a Christian upbring. My grandfather was a church minister. He died when I was 3yo so dont know if he was a serial abuser. I think he was too strong for that. I rejected Christianity when I was 19yo after reading a philosophy book by Ayn Rand called "Capitalism - the Unknown Ideal". Then I went on to read another one of her non-fiction books "The Virtue of Selfishness".
So within the space of a week I went from believing in altruism to believing in selfishness. Thats quite a reversal - considering the fundamentality of ethics. Apart from the fact that I'm a very courageous thinker, I think because I spent alot of my youth in the school library reading science books, I had a huge respect for reason and the objectivity of reality. For me there were not contradictions.

Since then my value system has chanced a little. I still believe in selfishness, but its not the type of selfishness where you achieve values at others expense - that is through the initiation of force. My concept is that I invest in myself, I create the security and values that I need to expand my realm of influence. So I start life very narrowly focused on myself, my education, my goals. When I am secure in myself, confident in myself, then I start investing in others. Not because its moral or noble to help others, but because it makes me feel good to identify and connect with people who share the same values. So selfishness involves helping oneself, then charity begins in the home, and grows. Although thats what some Christians do, their rationalisation is much different. They need the act of giving to be on altruistic terms. There has to be a sacrifice for it to be moral.
I think most of them have no ambition to follow through with their quest because their values are not theirs. It turns them into hypocrits. But more important look at the abuse at the institutional level. Child abuse, misuse of church funds. Evasion of what is considered their altruistic duty.

So my goal is to give selfishly where I get something in return. When you think about it. If you truly know how to help people, then the poor villages of Bangladesh or the Philippines are a gold resource to harness. Strangely education is a 'controlled' resource in the Philippines, even though this country was founded by missionaries. Its become an outmoded means of educating. Hard to believe it - the Philippines is actually rejecting investment in its education system. It will only accept unqualified financial assistance. so I say give them books you dont need anymore. Maybe Philippine Airlines could offer to distribute books from wealthy foreign countries to Philippine villages. It has a commanding position in distribution. So where are the books and where is the will?